The whole process of getting to the heart of you and God , at least for me, goes a little like shedding layers and layers of stuff like many coats. First thing is forgiveness. You go nowhere unless that happens. Then i have to ask the Holy Spirit to redefine the whole thing so I can see it from His perspective for both of us. Usually there are so many other things I am carrying around concerns for that are weighing me down. You know like money, Kids or health. I have to be willing to lay those down to seek Him or I am going to just be there to file my request and beg for answers, Instead of to know Him and be with Him. If that is the only conversation or time you and your spouse spend together I am sure you have discovered it is lacking intimacy and it is growing chilli and possible adversarial.
If your like me you have concerns about your life like Money ,kids or health. I have to lay those down. If I don't I will not be there for Him only to get my answers. I have to declare who He is to me . He loves me and has plans for me. I am not forgotten . The word says His that Hi thoughts for me are more than the grains of sand on the beach. It gets easy to break into gratitude after declaring the truth to my situations. When you start to really praise Your heart suddenly discovers itself and God . The presence is apparent and so is the love and relationship. He has so much He desires to share with us but He needs our undivided attention and focus on the USness of the two of us. It is truly amazing to find yourself in the courts of heaven with Daddie the King God. There seems to be a contentment even if you don't see an instant answer. You know He has got you no matter what. Somewhere down my path I see blessings unfold and joy fill my life. I see answers I would never have imagined. It is all because you seek Him first and the kingdom of heaven and all these thing get added unto you.